I got the cortisone shot.

So when I said that my plantar fasciitis was gone . . . or due to my lower back . . . or whatever I ended up saying . . . well, it came back.

Are you sick of the drama? ME TOO.

As God as my witness, I will never say my plantar fasciitis is gone again.

It was like the orthopedist jinxed me. After he pressed on my foot last week, the pain came back and didn’t really go away again. Im beginning to think it’s all psychosomatic.

Except that it isn’t.

The pain and stiffness were definitely back, so I had back pain AND foot pain. Excellent.

My physical therapist and my trainer and my husband and anyone else I respect told me to just get the ding-dang shot and get it over with so that’s what I did.

I called on Tuesday, and they were all, do you want to come this afternoon?

And I was all, NO! I’m not ready yet.

I was actually planning to make the appointment for next week and give my renegade foot a LITTLE BIT MORE TIME because it was STARTING to feel better again, but when they had an appointment for yesterday (Wednesday), I decided to put my big girl pants on and commit. So I did.

I WANNA RUN

Like most things, it wasn’t really as bad as I’d feared. It was more the oogey factor of having that big needle sink into my foot that bothered me than the pain. I have been through so much pain in PT that the needle was really just a little owie.

Ironically, it hurts worse now from the cortisone shot than it ever did from plantar fasciitis. I am eagerly waiting for the pain to subside so I can find out if it worked or not.

I realize that my biggest fear wasn’t the pain of the injection, although that was definitely stressing me out, but my biggest fear is that it won’t work and I will have to come to terms with the fact that I can’t run anymore. THAT would be, quite literally, insult on top of injury.

When I think about my runs last summer and how hard I worked to run that half marathon, when I drive down the roads I used to run and recall those steamy hot mornings when I pushed my body to its limits, I miss that. It’s like mourning the loss of a friend.

It’s weird how emotional I get when I contemplate not running anymore. To think that I could mourn something I spent 38 years of my life not even experiencing seems kind of silly, but it is what it is, whatever that’s supposed to mean.

Don’t tell me you’re sick of hearing about it. I KNOW YOU ARE, so you don’t have to say it.

I had a revelation of sorts yesterday.

I was praying that this cortisone shot works, and that I can keep the plantar fasciitis at bay for a long time, and as I prayed I realized that God gave me a gift in the ability to run and the exhilaration it provides and confidence I gained from it. That’s not really a new realization. When I run, I feel overwhelmed with thankfulness sometimes.

But what I realized was, if this is a gift, and if God takes it away, I have to trust that He will provide something else. And I will have to be open and willing to try other things so I can find that something else. And I will have to be okay with that. 

 

It helps to look at it that way. It’s still depressing to contemplate not running, but if I trust that God will provide something else, then I know it will all work out.

Meanwhile, I can only wait and see. Right now I’m pretty uncomfortable. Only time will tell if the cortisone shot works or not. The doctor said that once the pain and swelling subsides (hopefully by the weekend) I can go back to all my normal activities.

He also said I can quit PT. I will be interested to hear if my physical therapist thinks I should continue to treat my back or just take some time off and see how I do.

I have to admit, I will rather miss PT. I got to know my therapist quite well, and I kind of enjoy my visits. But at the same time, I will be happy to get those few hours of my week back!

I’ll update my Facebook page this weekend and let you know how I’m feeling, but my guess is it will be a few weeks before I REALLY know for sure if the shot worked. It might just give me some temporary relief, so I’m going to do my best not to get my hopes up too high for a while. Or probably ever. Once you have it, from what I understand, PF has a way of rearing its ugly head again and again.

I know everyone is as done with this saga as I am, but since many of you are keeping tabs on me, I figured I’d update. If you’re one of the ones who is sick and tired of hearing me whine, I’ll be back tomorrow with a fun fashion post (and a giveaway)!

Hey, I’m a mom. We aim to please!